That's it. Just never done it before and it took under an hour. It's easy to do. Buy some cleaner and watch a YouTube tutorial.

Thanks to some tips from you guys, the heating element replacement was completed without incident. Unfortunately, that did not resolve my issue. I am happy to report, however, that my dishes are now coming out dry and sanitized due to further troubleshooting, and I wanted to offer a PSA for how I did it because nothing I found through googling was ever gonna point me in the right direction. In fact, it was this comment from Dave. which got me started down the right path.

He was absolutely right. There should be some sort of protective device, not only to protect the element, but to protect against fire. So I started over and dragged the dishwasher back out, but this time I tipped it into its side to get to the underside and looked around. I followed some wires to a little switch mounted to the underside and there was a little black button on it. I pressed it. click

That's. All. I. Had. To. Do.

It's a little thermal cutoff switch. I just had to reset it. If anybody has a problem like mine, try this. But just know that it tripped open for a reason, so figure out why. In my experience, it was from my wife not knowing that "I'm flushing the water heater" doesn't just mean "no access to a hot shower"; it means "don't run appliances that are connected to hot water lines" lol.

Thanks again, Dave. I'm happy to have solved another problem!

My dishes have been coming out wet ever since flushing my water heater; my wife started a dishwasher load without telling me while I was in the middle of that project so I'm guessing it ran dry and fucked up the heating element.

I haven't noticed any issues draining. The dishes are coming out clean but wet. I've already run a reset on the board in case there was a fault that wasn't clearing or something. So now the most likely culprit is a dead element or maybe the switch for it?

I've acquired a new heating element and I'm planning on replacing it in hopes of getting dry dishes again today. Any tips beyond what a tutorial on YouTube would already bring up? Open the breaker, close the water valve, have a towel handy for any water that comes out of connections I'm breaking, etc. But maybe you know of some challenges in the process and a sort of life hack to make them easy?

I bought a house a couple months ago and have been fighting water heater issues since day one. First it was the thermal overload. I figured that out and adjusted the thermostats. Then the breaker was tripping. Once we moved in and started using hot water more, the breaker started tripping less for whatever reason. Lately, it started tripping very frequently, and water stayed hot for way less time. So I decided it was time to truly investigate. I assumed it was a dead lower heating element.

I opened the breaker, closed the fill valve, and opened the drain. Once water stopped draining, I removed the wiring from the top element and removed it. Water came out.

WTF, this should be drained... I shoved it back in to plug the hole and investigated the drain. I got my oil pan out and straightened a wire hanger and shoved it in there, ready to catch whatever came out.

I was not prepared for this. So much goddamn scale. I don't think this water heater has ever been flushed. I'm still hard at work, but I'm not exaggerating when I say that I've been working for hours to get this shit out. There was scale and brine sludge up to the lower element, which had corroded it apart. That's like a foot of this shit.

New elements are in and wired up (I found a pack of two elements and two thermostats for only like $35) and I'm continuously filling and draining while alternating between using the wire hanger and a small pipe cleaner to fuck the drain hole.

I've never looked forward to a hot shower more than I do right now.

Edit:

My wife cooked a delicious steak, potatoes, and asparagus dinner, paired with a nice Cabernet Sauvignon. I took 400mg ibuprofen for my back and then enjoyed an aged, cold Mad Elf Ale in a hot shower. The breaker has not tripped. I'll call this a success. I didn't fully flush all the crap out because I ran out of time, but I'll plan on doing a monthly flush until the chunks stop coming, and then I'm thinking a semiannual PM to flush it unless somebody recommends otherwise? I'm gonna also buy a new magnesium anode rod and replace the existing one within the year because it doesn't look like this one has ever been replaced. Magnesium because I'm on a water softener and I plan to have all of the hardness out of the heater soon enough, so hardness shouldn't be an issue.