Hey ABC, I wrote a better headline for you:

Conservatives force child rape victim to become parent

From the article:

they don’t just think they’re the smartest people in the world, they think that everyone else is stupid.

And that sums up techbros in one sentence.

Oh look, Conservatives sowing more doubt and mistrust because they can't handle it when faced with how unpopular they are.

Quelle surprise.

The market can remain irrational longer than you can remain solvent.

"He is for sale."

Dude was for sale before, too.

Remember: no Republicans are arguing Trump didn't break the law.

They're arguing he shouldn't be punished for it.

"You see, the short hair means she's a no-nonsense badass, but the long hair indicates she still has a soft, vulnerable, feminine side that can be won over by the male interest leading to the obligatory gratuitous sex scene, right before he is killed by the aliens."

❌ Soap Box
❌ Ballot Box
🔳 Jury Box
🔳 Ammo Box

Like amplify the false rumor a random Facebook mom in Ohio started?

Not defending Facebook, but if you record a video with sound, then the FB app has to have permission to record your audio.

That said, delete Facebook. Fuck Zuck.

Better headline:

The Right will believe literally anything except reality because they don't want to accept they're unpopular.

hyper-competitive marketplace

Ah yes, when I think of "hyper competitive" I think of the one and only one cable provider who services my neighborhood.

Hmm, sounds like Boeing needs to fire more engineers.

And increase C-level compensation, of course.

Insurrection when you're just mad you lost an election: 😁

Insurrection when your government is doing blatantly illegal things and the branch of government and party to which you belong refuses to hold anyone accountable because you're all complicit traitors: 😡

Reality is left leaning

I know this was a joke Colbert made, but the truth is the reverse: the left is reality-leaning. It's truly terrifying to see how divorced from reality the right-wing is, and how gleefully they just keep storming in that direction.

Fun fact: nearly 40% of all foodborne illnesses were caused by raw milk consumption. Pasteurization has reduced that number down to less than 1%, except in places where raw milk consumption is still allowed.

Alternatively, putting them up for collateral would require their real valuation to be assessed, which someone guilty of lying about their worth for sure wouldn't want to be known.

We're now seeing red states refusing federal aid because 1) it shows the federal government isn't the demon they make it out to be and 2) if they don't accept federal funds, they don't have to accept federal stipulations like "you can't not give this to poor gay children" and "Black children deserve to eat too."

Dark times are ahead.

Costco has increased foot traffic for 13 consecutive weeks, so not a bad guess people are going there.

This is something that needs to shouted loud and clear.

The Constitution protects citizens from the government. If you work for the government, you are what the Constitution protects us from. If you do not understand that, you do not need to be getting a paycheck drawn from taxpayers.