Spyke
Daft_ishreply
lemmy.world

At least let me apply. Or is this some recruit type situation where they meet me in a dark alley and burn off my fingerprints.

43
HikingVetreply
lemmy.ca

Email the CIA. Apply for military intelligence.

30
Fondotsreply
lemmy.world

You know years ago I heard a recruitment ad for the CIA on the radio, and that caught me a little off guard, I always kind of assumed the CIA personally reached out to specific candidates and hired through shady back channels and such and didn't really do open recruitment.

I guess it makes sense though, for every James Bond type super spy there's probably a hundred different random office staff, IT guys, clerks, mailroom guys, secretaries, janitors, accountants, etc. who handle boring day-to-day operational stuff and rarely or never get to see any of the crazy spy craft stuff happening.

And I guess once you land one of those jobs, maybe you can get your foot in the door for eventual promotion to International Man of Mystery.

5

I looked into it, and honestly compared to most private sector internships it seemed terrible, one of the alphabet agency internships I looked at was unpaid maybe all of them. And it was the most stereotypical intern stuff. Organizing files and the like.

2

They recruit from college students studying Chinese, Arabic, Russian...

2

At my university my whole class was invited to a seminar about how and why to join the Australian secret intelligence service as an intel officer.

1

If you have the background and get the right head hunter, you can get sponsored for your TS/SCI. I used to work for a place....

I will tell you, however, that working in a SCIF is not as awesome as it looks on TV.

9
lemmy.world

A) Labour is much cheaper in Russia than the US.

B) What foreign languages do you speak relatively fluently?

C) Do those foreign languages match to countries where elections have consequences AND the US has a vested interest in destabilizing them?

D) If the answer to C was yes, really? Where?

77
lemmy.world

OP thinks you should be scrolling on Indeed and see

Do you enjoy shitposting on the internet all day? Join the CIA and you can get paid to shitpost in our many psychological warfare operations. From attacking leftist causes and amplifying corporate shills in political races, to discrediting climate science and the ethnic cleansing of Palestinians in the Middle East, there is no limit to what you could accomplish with the CIA.

47
Lauchsreply
lemmy.world

Ahaha, that's great! Only thing missing is a specific list of countries they CIA intends to destabilize.

12

Haha, you'd think so, but this is why my link doesn't paint the full picture: The majority of our reserves up here are in the oil sands which are lot a lot more expensive to extract which makes them considerably less desirable.

1
lemmy.world

Are you in the military, at least? Because that's sort of step one. They don't want the random weed addict who is terminally online. They at least want to know you will follow orders and finish missions through.

30
lemmy.ca

....they should really consider taking the weed addicts.

11
kromemreply
lemmy.world

They are also probably giving the contract to a defense contractor who is turning around and outsourcing it, so there are no US based jobs to troll for the US.

6

You don't need to look to the military either.

Coca-cola experimented with subliminal advertising to see if they could mind control people into buying their products but for some reason we think they wouldn't stoop to manipulating social media, the Clockwork Orange reprogramming system that we pin our own eyelids open for.

1

I think OSINT, Open-source intelligence, would be more akin to trolling on social media. They're the ones who crawl through Instagram and shit to ID Russian soldiers locations when they post selfies and the likes.

1
lemmy.world

Not for the US military but that’s literally political advertising. Have you seen what the Lincoln project does?

8
chaogomureply
kbin.social

The military like doesn't do it, but the almost certainly CIA does...

2
Arbiterreply
lemmy.world

I mean, the military definitely has a PR division.

2

Because thats a important position that is probably obfuscated from the general public

7
lemmy.world

Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!

5

Wait... You were able to read this and you didn't die of laughter? Did Monty Pyhton lie to us?

3

Well they definitely can’t hire you now, this post will have blown your cover

4
feddit.de

Because NIPRNET sucks to do OSINT.

You don't want to be in the military for anything PSYOPS.

You'd be better off as a contractor.

4
kbin.social

You have expertise in the culture of your country. They need expertise in the culture of China/Russia/Iran/etc.

3

Not foreign operations. But it's relatively easy to get a us military tech job that is low impact. Application process is 3-6mo long but once you're in your golden.

2