Hello. This tutorial will teach you how to be a good, successful Hylic in today's world.

First things first, disregard things like spirituality and philosophy. They are just lies created to keep you from acquiring money and status. If someone calls you soulless, call them broke. If someone calls you basic, insult their appearance. Always remember, you have the right answer, and you know the proper way through life. So keep your eyes forward, focus on your goal, and never listen to criticism of any kind.

To win at life, first thing that you will need to acquire is conventionally attractive looks. Research what the majority of the population finds attractive and embody it. Whether it be in looks or in how you act, the majority should always dictate who you are.

The second thing you will require is value. Monetary value, as that is the only kind of value that matters. Beauty and art exist only to facilitate the creation of value. Acquire value by any means necessary, and remember, morality is more subjective the more value you hold. Once you have enough value, it won't matter if you did anything morally wrong to get it.

The third, and arguably most important thing you will need is status. Social status. The most important thing there is is how other people see you. So make sure they see you as better than them. Because you are better than them. You have conventionally attractive looks and a high value. People who don't have those things don't matter.

Now let's get into the meat of it. Let's face it, you were never good with metaphors. But that doesn't matter as long as nobody notices, so let me explain this more.

1. Appearance.

Firstly, appearance. This is how you appear to people. How they look at you and what they think of you. What is considered "good" or "attractive" appearance is determined by the consensus, so always look to the popular opinion to know what is good and what is bad, in both appearance and actions.

Choose an identity that appeals to the public at large. The best options are usually related to pop culture and media. It really doesn't matter what you choose, as long as people like you for it and want to engage with you because of it. Approval should be the first thing you consider when choosing an identity.

How you act impacts how people see you. You can't just look good from afar and expect results. Your actions have direct consequences in how people perceive you, so always remember to pander to the group you are currently engaging with. Learn their moral code and how they think, and act accordingly to garner approval.

Your apperance is only attractive as long as there isn't a more attractive person nearby. When confronted with a more attractive person, act humble and take note of what makes them different from you. Once you learn their mannerisms and how they act, try to imitate them to gauge the reaction of your own group. Ideally, your personality should be an amalgam of all the personalities other people find attractive.

You are empty. So the only way that you could ever feel happy and fulfilled is external validation. Fill your social circle with people who will validate your choices so that you can be truly happy.

1. Money.

Money is the ultimate measure of value. If someone doesn't have money, they have no value, so you should focus on acquiring as much money as possible to maximize your personal value at any cost.

If something doesn't produce value, it is worthless. You should ignore and disregard all things that do not have monetary value. Contrarily, if something has a high monetary value, it should be important to you.

Do not be afraid of thoughts and emotions, they are not real. The only thing that is real is value. As long as you have value you can be sure that you are doing everything right. People who argue against that are wrong on the matter of principle, as they focus on things different than value.

Things like hobbies and passions should have no place in your life if they do not produce value. Enjoyment is not value. Value is enjoyment. If anyone tells you otherwise, they are fools who don't know what they are talking about. Value is everything, and don't let anyone convince you otherwise.

Once you are acquiring as much value as possible, you shouldn't rest, you should optimize. There are always things to improve, waste to cut out, inefficiency to smooth over. You should optimize everything about yourself, and make your life as efficient as possible to further facilitate value acquisition.

1. Status.

The two previous things exist only so that you can acquire this one. Status is the most important thing about a person.

If someone's social status is lower than yours, they are inferior to you, and it is correct to treat them as such. If someone's social status is lower then you, it is clear that they haven't worked as hard as you, and are therefore lazy and worthless. If someone is worthless, it is perfectly fine to take advantage of them. In fact, they deserve to be taken advantage of, because they clearly aren't as dedicated and focused as you.

You can't be immortal. Yet. Status is the closest thing to immortality we have. If you have high status, you will live forever in the minds of the people. Think about the pharaohs who ordered that the pyramids built. Think about the monuments to presidents. That is a symbol of status. That is immortality. Nobody remembers the peasants, they remember the king. When your body is dust and rot, your status will remain, so you should focus all your energy on cultivating as much of it as possible.

Once you are the most attractive person in the room, and have more money than God, the only thing that remains is how people perceive you as a person.

The image of yourself that you present to people should be idealized and curated. Nothing good ever comes from having flaws, so people should think you don't have any. But if you do find something about yourself that could be considered a flaw, you should bury and hide that part of yourself, so that no one can ever know.

The goal is to be seen as the master of the material world. Once you have enough status, things that are "human" no longer concern you.