In a just world, even asking for this would be a death sentence for a company.

What an odd thing to want.

We are merely the vessel with which to produce harm.

Facefuck, 2026.

How about just fix your god damn product so people won't constantly sue you? Business nowadays is just completely asinine

Mafia lobbies to get criminal law to be rewritten to remove punishments for crimes.

Almost as if the real goal is not protecting children, but surveillance.

They want to get products in the hands of very young children to create customers for life.

This is the happy meal strategy on steroids.

"We want this child safety bill to protect our corporation from children please" is such a good look

They'll get it too as long as they push it through before the midterms, maybe even after depending on what those look like

🧑‍⚖️: "But what if your best revenuing content creators are children?"
🤓: "That's why I need you to rewrite it."
👶🧒: "Wait... wat?!"

🤓: "Don't worry. I'll protect you guys."

Let's just make brutal fucking murder and large theft legal already! /s

That's who knew Zuck was a nonce /s

Why won't they please think of the children!?

Legislators: "and we just have to pass it guys, sorry. No choice in the meter. They propose it, we pass it for them. That's how this all works"

Laws to allow companies to permanently fuck up our children....