Midjourney pivots from AI image generation to body scanning medical spa where patients bathe in 'golden light'
The underlying technology is real...and borrowed from a partner the company failed to mention
https://www.theregister.com/ai-and-ml/2026/06/18/midjourney-pivots-from-ai-image-generation-to-body-scanning-medical-spa-where-patients-bathe-in-golden-light/5258429Open linkView original on lemmy.zip
New Theranos just dropped
I thought this was an Onion article at first.
It’s not very reassuring how they call it “the midjourney scanner”, or how they put the organs on the wrong side in their image, or how the image is completely unreadable because of all the stupid colors…. And probably (poorly) AI generated.
So between the image and the article we all go to a 'spa' at the bottom of a data center, to plop into a human size piss coloured tube of water and get scanned by a machine that has no FDA approval (TBH given the corruption in the US FDA approval wouldn't mean much anyway).
We are then full body scanned and diagnosed maybe by AI? so our health issues can be logged and solutions sold to us? ...if we escaped the tube that is. AI might just deem us too much of a cost.
Does this sound right?
see the way it works is once per day you can open a gamble box which will give you either a diagnosis or a treatment and you get to figure out which goes to which but you can buy more boxes any time you want.
https://www.gateworld.net/sg1/s4/the-light/
This like the opposite of AllBirds pivoting from shoes to AI data centers.
Fun game, guess what comes next!
For bonus points: explain whether or not “we believe it’s possible we could prevent a third of all deaths :3” is legally actionable in any way
Literally what the fuck?