xkcd #3257: Beam Pipe
Title text:
'If you keep trying to spray your collaborators with the beam when they're not looking, I'm turning off the ion source and NO one will get to play with the beam!' --Physics's mom
Transcript:
Transcript will show once it’s been added to explainxkcd.com
Source: https://xkcd.com/3257/
536
Comments29
Never mind that their thumb is now an anti-thumb.
The only person that can count to -1
One two three four, would you like to play thumbonuclear war?
You have to be careful with that logic, or born again right wing christian groups will go nuts. Lemme explain.
If
Christ is everywhere
Then
Christ is in the large Hadron collider.
And if
[stuff] inside the collider becomes anti-[stuff]
Then:
--> The LHC creates the Antichrist.
!!
Then The Antichrist and Christ touches and is turned into energy, and levels half of Switzerland.
And think what that would do to the snow sports industry.
Oh no, they'd have to move the wef to monaco
God, it would be funny to see people protesting based on this.
Today’s satire is tomorrow’s debate topic.
I wish i could push back on that by saying no one would be dumb enough to make that argument non satirically, but...
Never shall they twiddle
This kills the thumb
The mind is willing, but the flesh is bruised
But is powerful as hell for that brief moment!
Would it actually?
I mean.... Yes? https://www.askamathematician.com/2011/06/q-if-you-stood-in-the-beam-of-the-lhc-what-would-happen/
Reads more like a clear no? Even with an actual person who experienced it?
Imagine backing up and shoving that in your butt.
It would literally give you ass cancer.
Oh no, you wouldn't even have time to get cancer. That shit'll just straight up kill your cells then and there.
The hose scientists are like "hmm the particles stopped flowing, there must be a kink."
Let's make anti-shit!
Oh, like covering the end of the hose, lol
I could be wrong but I don't think those particles are largely effected by that type of pressure.
I use a sprayer (pictured) to water my tomatoes. Maybe the scientists could adapt something like that for their collider? BTW what happens when you put the collider on the "mist" setting?
Behold... The Extra-Large Hadron Collider!
Hell, let's go American sizes... XXXL Hadron Collider!
Is that like the water jet from the swimming pool? Can I masturbate with it, too, or will it melt my nads into a gooey paste? I'm gunna try either way, I just wanna know what to expect.
I loved drinking from the beam pipe as a kid
Oh man, LMAO
Best post and thread I've seen in a long time!
And just when I needed it.