At 48, Sheila Heti found herself thinking she didn’t need to live much longer—not because she was in despair, but because she had a strange sense that life, for her, had plateaued. She was sure that her future would simply be repetitive of her past. To mull this feeling, she took part in a series of psychedelic-assisted therapy sessions using ketamine, DMT, MDMA, and LSD, reflecting deeply after each session. Does she behold God on LSD? She does, but that’s just one of the many remarkable experiences she has on these mind-altering substances.