Spyke
lemmy.world

If you just left the door OPEN I could come and go at I please. Mice would also wander in on their own, which you need since you're such a bad hunter! You always drop them outside! You should kill them before taking them outside so that you can eat them instead of allowing them to escape!

4

Eactly, people think cats are messing with them when they go out then want to come right back in. I think they're just trying to get them to leave the door open.

2

Look, I don't want to overstep, but your hygiene is awful. I've only ever seen you lick the very ends of your paws, and then you don't do anything with it. I know you must be embarrassed, looking mostly like a sphinx, but you should at least groom the patch of fur on your head that you do have.

3

Trip over me! TRIP OVER ME, DADDY! I love you! Come back! Wait, let me run in front of you. NOW TRIP OVER ME!!

2

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Things your cat would say if he/she could talk | Spyke