Spyke

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View original on lemmy.world

54 replies

Anticorpreply
lemmy.world

You don't measure your penis with a digital depth gauge?

50
Ulvainreply
sh.itjust.works

Everybody knows real men measure their penises in metric

9
Foshezereply
lemmy.world

No but now you made me want to get out my micron gauge.

2

In my case, that would be the difference between nonexistence or double size.

7
mander.xyz

Measuring your penis down to the hundredth of an inch; totally not insecure at all.

70
boolyreply
sh.itjust.works

Lists penis length to hundredths of an inch, won't list height, only posts selfies of himself sitting down.

31

This is clever, I had to look again and literally laughed out loud when I saw it.

12
lemmy.world

One thing turning people off is certainly that they're imagining they have hundreths of an inch accuracy instead of just writing 7 3/4.

46

The more accurate the number looks the more realer it is! That's stience, you rube!

8

You got something here. That is how Americans or people used to the imperial system would write this. This is satire, but not from someone that uses the imperial (inch) system regularly. Here in Germany, you don't use fractions like that like Americans do.

3

He wants to say he’s white, but not one of those swarthy Greeks or Italians that make his bloodline impure.

62
norimeereply
lemmy.world

If I remember right, there are only 3 countries that have coastlines at the Mediterranean Sea AND the Atlantic ocean. Spain, France and Morocco.

My guess is, he uses such a weird definition because he is North African but wants to highlight his not being brown, because that doesn't go well with his white supremacy.

17

There's a certain level of racist that gets really involved in classifying humans into small subcategories so they can know how racist they should be to each one. Used to be popular with "scientific racism" in the 19th century, but you don't see it much anymore.

It's extra weird.

10

If I had to guess, after seeing this weird shit and watching too much pseudo-archaology debunking stuff lately: he means the descendants of the Mediterranean and Atlantian people. There's a crazy group of people who think Atlantis is real, and either had a worldwide advanced culture, or at least through the Mediterranean.

The Atlantis myth was heavily accepted by the Nazis as the ancestors of the Aryan people, which is why the Aryans are "so much better" than everyone else. It is still a popular tool to belittle ancient people and to say their accomplishments had to be done instead by this white Atlantian group instead.

9

It means one of their grandparents is from Italy, otherwise it'd be "Northern European".

4

Probably, but then, there are people out there that would unironically post shit like this.

6
lemm.ee

Anyone here ever play Disco Elysium? That Atlanto-Mediterranean sounds like something Measurehead would say.

34

I'd be willing to wager that the Venn diagram of Lemmy users and people who have played it is basically just a circle

7

OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP B4 IS DONE GIVING ORDERS AROUND HERE. THE INFLUENCE OF THE "HAM SANDWICH RACE" IS WANING.

5

Wtf is wrong with this dude.

Obsessed with comparison.

E: if anyone reading this has intrusive thoughts of comparing yourself to others, stop that shit. Comparison to others is a killer of all joy, and nobody cares except you.

27
lemmy.world

I love that he’s rounded it to two decimal places. As if a woman would say, “7.7? That’s it?”

32
kinsnikreply
lemmy.world

yeah, there is no way the measurement instrument was precise enough to make that last decimal significant

13

He just wants to filter out all the women who understand sig figs because he can't handle dating someone smarter or more educated than him.

Also, if he was going to measure in fucking inches he should've just called it "3/4"

11
lemmy.world

I love that he included his penis size at all. As if a woman would say, "Oh finally, a man who is letting me know the important details I really care about."

12
norimeereply
lemmy.world

His second message after saying "Hi" is probably a dick pic.

6

And that's something like the 99.99999th percentile according to the chart on the Wikipedia penis size page - absolutely NSFW - which has nothing larger than 18 cm.

The apparently much less studied vaginal depth seems to max out at 14 cm before arousal, so I think it's safe to say most women wouldn't be impressed by that number even if it weren't an obvious lie.

3
lemmy.world

Digital calipers use decimal inches rather than fractional. I’m guessing that was what he used to measure himself.

14

I'm thinking he used his eyes and threw out a number that he liked.

13
frezikreply
midwest.social

This is one place where the metric system really shines. If I say I'm 6.5", it sounds like I'm desperate for that last half inch. If I say I'm 17cm, that's just what it is.

5

If I say I'm 17cm, that's just what it is.

If you're 17cm you would get steady work in Hollywood

1

Willing to settle for minarchist...

Based on the rest of this prick's ad, there's a nigh 100% chance he is a menarchist (ephebophile).

7