If we're talking those “diet” sugarfree ones you'd better be sitting on the toilet, from what I heard, because you're probably gonna be “processing” them fast and violently...

Greek god of dread and terror. Also, the smaller and outermost of the two satellites of Mars, named after said god.

This sounds like malicious incompetence...

Almost as bad for your health and the environment as hydroxilic acid...

Yeah, but Turtle was also abusing the dog, who is the only real victim here.

It often happens to be both, though.
Which seems particularly likely in this case, given Spez & co.'s track record of being both malicious and stupid, more often than not at the same time...