i‘m not writing this from the perspective of a parent, but a 23yo Gen Z who’s had parents which didn’t know what to regulate.
in some places my parents regulated „very intensely“. oftentimes they did so quite suddenly and without much communication/ explanation.
then again there were times and places where the lack of regulation allowed me to spend hours and hours each day, doom scrolling on instagram.
i spent years contemplating the situations and what would’ve been good.
your child’s mental health is the main key. in my experience the lack of self regulation is a coping mechanism. i was doing horribly and my parents solution wasn’t to help me, but to play whack a mole with symptoms by regulating. don’t get me wrong tho, it’s not just me, ive seen this a bunch of times with other ppl too.
-> the better your kids mental health, the less there will be a need to regulate. if they do struggle, help them by working with them, not against them. look for solutions with them. don’t just set regulations, discuss what to do WITH THEM. let them set targets and what to do if they aren’t met with you. there will be lots of resentment and cheating around restrictions if you don’t work with them. everyone i know who’s been forced into find my or live360 has used a variety of techniques to spoof their location. not to mention that all of them at least kinda hate their parents for it.
so:
- if you want regulations to work, they need to be voluntary.
- ensure good mental health to prevent media abuse as coping mechanism.
they say that strict parents raise liars, and i’ve seen that proven many times.
