It's not really a fiasco at all. OP seems to be blowing it way out of proportion. For the vast majority of users it's not a big deal at all. They are disallowing port forwarding due to how many letters/threats they've gotten from their datacenters and law enforcement.

Auto-block federation from servers that don’t respect.

What does this mean?

Man, I just had a glance at Nostr as this is the first I've heard of it, and literally every single post/video/image was about bitcoin. For me, that's a huge turn off personally. I have absolutely zero interest in any bitcoin related stuff, and it's made sure I'll be avoiding Nostr in the future.

Not sure if it can be cached by Cloudflare

Every time I've turned on caching on my instance, it goes into a redirect loop and doesn't connect. I've tried searching everywhere to see if it's just something I've done wrong (which is how I found this comment) but can't find any tutorials or anything on caching with cloudflare on lemmy. I'm guessing it's just not possible.

I2P is a darknet similar to Tor in some ways, but it is perfectly legal and safe to use depending on what you’re doing on it, of course.''

TOR is completely legal and safe to use depending on what you are doing as well. Let's not demonize the service due to a few bad actors.

Or they completely ignore and it and nothing happens until someone actually sues them and it goes through the courts, which could take years.