People who followed Gamergate knew he was trash back then. Rebecca Watson talks about it a bit in one of her videos. I think it's this one: https://youtu.be/ZoO9FZXUgv4

Random article from a decade ago about this: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/sep/18/richard-dawkins-sexist-atheists-bad-name

That being said, this is a good reminder.

I'm sorry to hear that happened to you. I think I "talk like a woman" and in certain areas make a conscious effort not to. Women tend to use more qualifiers and are less definite in their statements. I will be 100% right and still say "I think" or "maybe". It's the whole confident women are bossy women thing. It's not true at all, but there's still so much of that mentality.

They were probably just trying to say something offensive, but if it means anything it's likely just that you're confident and knowledgeable, because thanks to misogyny that's what we think men sound like and not what we think women sound like. Take it as a compliment if anything. It's possible you were just being effortlessly correct lol. And obviously that's what women sound like if you're a woman and that's what you sound like.

It's not untrue, though some also get things right. I can't stop recommending children of time, and I love the way the author dealt with gender. It was a good read regardless, but imho he did a great job writing female characters.

Hey girl, this is your friend speaking. Leave him. I promise, the person you're meant to be with will make noises so cute you'll regret every second spent not hearing them.

You deserve better than to be with someone who is by your own admission "not a good partner". Choose loving yourself.

That just turns paid apps into splash screens for in-app purchases though. That way apple never gets a cut because the "purchase" is in-app. Pay to be listed (maybe tiered depending on downloads) seems fair especially because it doesn't incentivize people to do scammy things with pricing. It's already a fee anyway.

Yes. I think remember one where people read a story and the name was changed and when it was a male name they gave positive words like leader and decisive and with a female name it was negative like pushy and demanding.

This isn't exactly what I was talking about but came up immediately on a search: https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2014/12/10/study-finds-gender-perception-affects-evaluations

This is a women only community focused on things that relate to women. The comic is not saying the problem is exclusive to women, just that it affects women, though Wikipedia and most articles acknowledge it's more prevalent in women's fashion. I'd recommend taking your comment to the original thread since I don't think it's relevant here.

Yea, I looked through some previous posts on this community and guys seem to be negatively responding to the mod when she politely informs them not to comment. They are the ones breaking the rules and when she tells them they get mad. Really sad to see.

I agree regarding the blocking, but it sucks because a bunch of other guys don't understand why. So when I want to play a team game and I tell people in a relevant gaming space that I don't play with a specific person it looks like I'm the bad guy. I know I'm not in the wrong, but now I'm stuck either alienating potential friends if I don't explain further or spending time and energy explaining something they may not understand. It's exhausting. I know that the guys aren't trying to be rude when they ask why, but it's alienating. I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir here, but male dominated online spaces can be rough even if the majority are relatively normal. Unless they go the extra step from normal to actually understanding the female perspective they are almost contributing to the issue. It's not a if you're not with me you're against me thing, but it really feels like if you're not with me from the start it's an uphill battle.

I didn't see any information on if male guests or children were allowed. I think having spaces where women feel safe is important, but I'd be interested to see how this is implemented. I've definitely been in places where there was a designated "don't interact with guy from apartment X" welcome crew. It'd be nice to not have to worry about that so much.

This comment links to the article: https://lemmus.org/comment/15733715

You might not have intended it but your other post feels like bait. Is this the first time this has ever happened to you? I step to the side a lot and am a woman. I have friends of all genders who do this. It's imho a strange thing to post about in the first place and then you asked specifically for male feedback. You also mentioned your outfit and posted a picture of it. If you thought only men could offer insight and that what you looked like would be relevant then the conclusion about it being covid related seems at odds with that. It looks like some comments are just pointing that out. No one deserves hate or shade for posting what you posted though and I see someone had their comment removed and someone started bringing up transphobia. Im sorry to see that happened.

As an aside, I do think it's fine if men want to give women additional space. Men don't have to think of themselves as a threat in order to do that. When I'm walking dogs I will do the same thing. Not because I think the dog is potentially dangerous or anything. I just don't know if that person wants to be close to a dog so I make a point of stepping aside. It's courteous. Not everyone does it and it's not mandatory but it's fine if they do. I do it myself if it's late sometimes and I'm passing a child or almost anyone who is smaller than me. I want them to know that I see them and am cognizant of their space.

I know we're supposed to avoid politics here, but I think it's maybe politically neutral to at least say that people, especially from minority groups, should at least be engaged in politics, and the following quote closes out the article: When pressed further for her thoughts about President Donald Trump praising her, Sweeney responded that she was not monitoring the situation closely.

Rose (a member of the LGBT community) was passed over to play an LGBT woman. She was replaced with someone who is not LGBT and has not said anything to defend the community (that I've seen) and seems to court approval from people who are anti that community.

I don't think I would have made that statement, certainly not in that way, but it's the responsibility of people who have a voice to call out others in their community who do harm. Rose is using her platform to call attention to a woman she perceives as not supporting other woman and her community. I think not being able to call other women out just because they also face misogyny is not the answer. I think it's always ok to call out the Anita Bryant's of the world. I do think it should have been done differently, but I'm not going to police the language of people experiencing oppression and expressing their frustration.

Though as a general statement, people should uplift one another is not a bad worldview.

It seems like you answered your own question for the most part. Generally when people complain about getting attention for their features, breast or otherwise, they're likely talking about attention that's negative or makes them uncomfortable. There will always be outliers, but I don't think people are regularly complaining about the fact they have a partner who respects them as a person and respects their entire body who just happens to find their breasts attractive. You seem to acknowledge that being viewed exclusively sexually by strangers can be uncomfortable, so I'm not sure really what else there is to it. You can feel however you like about your body and the way people look at it, but I always encourage doing the work to investigate those feelings and make sure they are truly yours and there for the right reasons. Sometimes it's nice to feel attractive, but it's important not to need external validation to know your worth. As long as you're comfortable and not in danger, you do you.

Agree all around. I saw a thread recently about street harassment and men were just circlejerking about how women are the ones targeting them 🙄

I tried to start an all female gaming server recently but of course I got a bunch of responses from men explaining how that's sexist and some other presumably well meaning guys that explained that they are feminists and understand if I don't want men but would be happy to join if I ever wanted additional people. It's hard to explain that messaging in the first place regardless of if they were nice about it is an issue. I said women only and I meant women only. They clearly saw that and still replied. I understand they were polite but that's really not the point.

Omg. So true. I've seen that meme around but never put it in this context. It really does exemplify the issue. I don't want to seem like I don't care about others opinions, but time and place are so important. I'm definitely just gonna start sending this. I think it gets the point across without being too specific or requiring a full write up about how in this specific context their comment was not necessary.

I'm glad they federated. I would not have found this community otherwise and Lemmy is so small I don't think it'd make sense to make the community harder to find. I wonder if they can set up a flared users only situation. I'm not sure what things look like on the mod side of Lemmy though.

I had a somewhat similar conversation with some friends recently about early relationships and boundaries.

I had a boyfriend that didn't take a no early in our relationship. I first just indicated no silently (moving hand away etc), then indicated no verbally, and he still tried to do something to me physically that I just expressed no about. I'm really proud that I stuck to my boundaries and got up and left, but that could have gone very differently. He was much bigger and stronger, and had I not known him through certain circles I might not know how he would react to me leaving. I was previously SAd and had done a lot of work building up my confidence and boundaries and he was not very experienced. He later sincerely apologized. He was legitimately confused about the situation and thought he was doing what he should. We had multiple extensive conversations about enthusiastic consent and eventually resumed dating. He was always good about consent from that point forward, but he essentially used my body as a learning experience. I'm glad it happened to me and not someone else, and I'm glad we had the conversation we did because now he knows for any future partners, but it really is scary to think how entitled he felt to my body and that there are other people out there like that.

There are several things people learn when just starting out dating, and I'm sure I messed up a lot and said things I shouldn't have or said things wrong, but I never took liberties with someone's body. Obviously, it happens to all kinds of people, by all kinds of people, but on the whole it seems like it's heavily related to socialization. I think we need to do a better job of teaching consent and boundaries to all children. That and kindness. I think more of that and we'd stop mistreating our partners, because it ends up just being a microcosm of how we treat society.

I agree that it's mostly men doing it. I was more just looking to shoehorn in that book recommendation lol. I will say some female romantasy authors can kind of go the other way. It's mostly a bad writer issue in both cases, and at least the female authors didn't do it in a way that objectifies women for both a primarily male audience and the men in the story.

This kind of gets at the issues I see most bad female authors run into: https://youtu.be/ejklu1OvWFs

They're different pitfalls, but I'm also a getting a little sick of them too.

I think you bring up a good point that most people likely have hormone cycles. We had a trans member of the community make a post recently regarding how they are experiencing period like symptoms and that other trans women have also experienced cyclical period like symptoms. I think a there's a lot of variety in the human experience and my biggest issue is when people don't recognize these differences as valid. It's so important that we recognize that we're more alike than different, but everyone faces their own unique issues and I like to leave a lot of space for that.

Sorry to hear about your PCOS, but glad you've got the diagnosis and seem to have gotten a handle on what sounded like some bad periods.

I just picked up crochet for the first time. I got a starter kit recently but didn't realize it's at an intermediate level 🫣 I still don't quite have the hang of it, but I'm glad I've branched out and am proud of myself for sticking to it.