encrulepted
retr0.id/media/bd23a2fb-c7a6-4…
alt text:
Goose chase meme. In the first frame, the goose asks "all the data is encrypted?" In the second, the goose chases a person, asking "encrypted how and with whose keys, motherfucker?"
744
Comments37
I once had to work with a government agency that insisted they generate and provide my private key.
At least they told you about the wire tap?
I'm migrating millons of encrypted credit cards from one platform to another (it's all in the same company, but different teams, different infra, etc).
I'm the one responsible for decrypting each card, preparing the data in a CSV, and encrypting that CSV for transit. Other guy is responsible for decrypting it, and loading it into the importer tool. The guy's technical lead wanted me to generate the pair of keys and send him the private key, since that way I didn't have to wait for the guy and "besides, it's all in the same company, we're like a family here".
Of course I didn't generate the key pair and told them that I didn't want to ever have access to the private key, but wow. That made me lose a lot of respect for that tech lead.
So you wanna be key buddies? Respectfully.
I know one municipal agency that does the same...
pictured: Nothing Chats
Probably also whatsapp chat, imessage, and other proprietary encrypted messaging apps out there.
Many chat apps actually use the Signal protocol for end to end encryption. This includes WhatsApp, Google Messages (RCS), Facebook Messenger, and Skype. iMessage doesn't seem to use it.
deleted
Why is end to end encryption a red flag???
deleted
oh, red flag for facebook, that makes sense.
but then if you care about privacy why touch anything Facebook has made at all?
deleted
But we also can't check their process since they are closed source. Also, if they can decrypt in the browser or proprietary app, then they can still read your messages. Browser is vulnerable to other attacks.
That's not even Nothing Chats' biggest problem: it's that it gets completely MITM'd by going onto some mac mini in some server farm somewhere.
I suggest we rename base64 to ’Military encryption’.
ITS NOT ENCRYPTION ITS ENCODING D':
I love seeing ads touting "military grade" things, it basically means...it probably isn't worth buying.
'Military GRADE encryption' *
Isn't that rot13?
It's encrypted by changing the font to windings and making the text colour white before sending.
Looking directly at you, Telegram!!
At least it has one-to-one E2EE and straight upgrade from vk.
Our website is using ssl, to keep you protected.™
rot26
Wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow.... The data are encrypted
Ugh. This is one of the correct usages that actually bothers me.
Correct according to whom? The word has a long history of being used with a singular verb. The dictionary indicates it is usually used with a singular verb. Only a small number of people insist on trying to override this.
Who cares if it is plural in Latin? Once something moves into a new language, it’s not beholden to the old language. We don’t use a plural verb with “spaghetti”. Germans borrowed the word “party” from English and they pluralize it as “partys” — they don’t need to follow our rules for what is now also their word.
Don’t give in to these people who claim that “data” is supposed to be plural. They are treating a personal preference as a fact.
To be fair, German (and other languages) borrowing from Italian is a whole can of worms, but you're right: Borrowed words don't need to follow all the declination or conjugation roles from their original language.
See also: Two espressos. One zucchini.
God I think I love you
So there's like a talking goose and your first thought is to criticize it on grammar?
Ye
just a vigenere cipher because budget cuts
it's ok i'm always losing my keys anyway
but my couch cushions are pretty secure
openssl and I created my own keys! suck it, verisign!
Now tell me all the {en,de}cryption points in your event sourcing.
I'm a goose and I'm coming for yous!