I think my vagina is too small
NSFW
I am ten years post op and well. In the beginning I dilated but after a few months a cismale friend shamed me into not doing it as much. I don't know if this is why...
My vaginal depth isn't a problem. I'm a good five inches deep. But the opening doesn't seem to be wide enough.
I have a boyfriend and recently we've become sexually active, I love him and want to experience intimacy with him... but when I ride him I can't get his phallus to go in..
So he gets me on my back and manages to insert himself into me, but it hurts. Depth isn't the issue.. I'm not wide enough for him to properly get in.
I don't know what to do. Is there a dilation regimen I could try or do I need to see a doctor about this?
Thank you. And I'm sorry if I did tmi.
9 replies
I'm still a few years from bottom surgery, but that definitely does sound like a not dilating enough/with a large enough dilator to me based on my reading, so maybe try increasing frequency or look at getting a bigger one?
Boo that dude who shamed you for doing part of the work that goes into bottom surgery
Do you have a dilation therapy set or a good doctor? A doctor might be able to prescribe you a set for free, depending on your situation. It's pretty basic. Use between once daily or every other day. Slowly work your way up, take a break if it hurts in a bad way, use lube.
I have a dilator set I bought off Amazon. Though I am not sure where I left it.
I had a good doctor but she left the practice and I'm waiting to be assigned a new one
Try a pelvic floor physical therapist. You should be able to increase width over time, unlike depth which often loss of depth is permanent. It will likely require time, patience, and some amount of pain, depending on your situation. A gynecologist might also be able to help using cortisone injections under some circumstances. The real issue is usually finding providers with experience with neovaginas.
I ended up with severe scarring and wasn't able to get much width at all, but I just recently had some revision surgery and I'm hoping it will help, but I'm currently working on it. Mostly what helped me outside of stretching tissue, which I wasn't able to do with the scarring, was muscle control, learning to relax them and do reverse kegels.
My biggest issue is the difference in sizes between most dilators is too much to allow for good progressive stretching. I found a device called Milli and I had some limited success with it. However it is tapered a little too much for what I hoped and it doesn't apply equal pressure around the vagina, but has 4 pressure points from the expanding arms. It is the only medical device I could find of its kind, though. I have though about getting one of those inflatable things marketed for training for anal sex in some sex shops, but not too hopeful. My general routine right now is to dilate twice a day, once concentrating on width and another on depth, but I'm still healing from surgery so I have been avoiding too much pressure so I don't tear any sutures and cause more scarring.
From the surgery? I've started on the road to getting a vaginoplasty and stories like this make me really scared. Is it common for them to not go well? D':
7 weeks post op here, everything is fine so far? I barely needed pain meds outside of the first day.
PPT vaginoplasty
Yeah, I've also heard needing revisions is apparently quite common, I'm also a little worried
I looked up Milli and it looks cool, but it's 400 dollars
Yeah, when I got it it was a little cheaper, but I also had some HRA money I needed to use before it expired, so that helped out as well. I don't think it's worth $400 in it's current state. Maybe if they make some improvements.