Then how do you trick the linker?

No. What he hell? Send them a coding guide for a start.

It's always either static calls with at least a dozen parameters or no input no output mystery state pinball madness

Here's this masterpiece I wrote for Python class.

import document
def greeting(user_name: str):
    def generate_greeting(greet_user: str):
        # Java
        class Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClass:
            def __init__(self):
                def abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory():
                    def abstract_greeting_generator_factory():
                        def abstract_greeting_generator(user_name: str):
                            def greeting_generator(user_name: str):
                                #return("Hello, " + user_name + "!")
                                # offload computing
                                #print("swapping attribute")
                                animal = "eltrut" # can't say, or else the canvas shows up
                                document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").setAttribute("greet_name", user_name)
                                #print("inserting script")
                                document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").innerHTML = "<input type=image src=1 onerror=\"document.getElementById('python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas').setAttribute('greet_name', 'Hello, ' + document.getElementById('python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas').getAttribute('greet_name') + '!')\">"
                                #print("waiting for response")
                                while document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").getAttribute("greet_name") == user_name:
                                    pass # CPU waste inator 3000
                                #print("hiding crimes")
                                # id=xss doesn't w*rk, I tried
                                document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").innerHTML = ""
                                #print("returning")
                                return(document.getElementById("python_" + animal[::-1] + "Canvas").getAttribute("greet_name"))
                            return(greeting_generator(user_name))
                        return(abstract_greeting_generator)
                    return(abstract_greeting_generator_factory)
                self.abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory = abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory
            def return_greeting_generator_factory_factory(self):
                return(self.abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factory)
        Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClassInstance = Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClass()
        abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryInstance = Abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryClassInstance.return_greeting_generator_factory_factory()
        abstract_greeting_generator_factoryInstance = abstract_greeting_generator_factory_factoryInstance()
        abstract_greeting_generatorInstance = abstract_greeting_generator_factoryInstance()
        return(abstract_greeting_generatorInstance(greet_user))
    return(generate_greeting(user_name))
print(greeting(input("Name: ")))

I also have one somewhere that runs Minecraft