Noted philanthropist Donald Trump makes buying stocks affordable to all Americans through kind-hearted economic crash
“With the near trillion dollar sell-off on the Nasdaq alone earlier yesterday, the rapid devaluing of assets has allowed the American public unparalleled access to cheap stocks and shares on the market.”
Economic spokesman for the White House, Chuck Williams, claimed, “People use words like slump, looming economic depression, lowest recorded IQ of any president ever, as though they’re bad things.
https://newsthump.com/2025/03/11/noted-philanthropist-donald-trump-makes-buying-stocks-affordable-to-all-americans-through-kind-hearted-economic-crash/Open linkView original on lemmy.world
5 replies
i always fall down with laughter when u guys do stuff like this!
Please keep it up!
It's true though, there's a fire sale going on.
There's a falling knife going on, with the floor nowhere near.
Caught this one right away when they used "philanthropist" and "Trump" in the same sentence, and it wasn't "Trump is not a philanthropist".
Good to see a bona fide Onion article instead of the ‘we have the Onion at home’ slop every other media outlet has been pushing lately. Brings a tear to the eye.