Just wanted to let y'all know: you can't kidnap seagulls from a parking lot.
Seagulls are protected under the "Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918". This means that it is illegal to capture, kill, or keep a seagull in your home (unless you have a special permit).
So, no: you cannot go into the Meijer parking lot, yoink a seagull from the flock, and take it home.
This PSA has been brought to you by an argument with my son during a grocery pick-up.
Thank you.
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So unfair. Meanwhile, if a flock of seagulls picks you up and flies away with you, there are no legal consequences for them whatsoever.
Almost happened to me once, but then I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran, I ran all night and day.
It's not so bad, really. From up here, Aurora borealis comes in view
I understand that this is upsetting, as I know many Michigan residents who have lost loved ones in the Seagull Wars.
However, seagull deterrents are legal, as long as it does not directly harm the birds themselves.
A human would probably be too heavy for a flock of seagulls to fly away with. They'd be more likely to run so far away with you.
Perhaps too heavy for Herring Gulls, but they could be carried by Great Black-Backed Gulls.
Perhaps if they were to put you on a line between them
I really feel there’s a coconut joke in here somewhere
Not entirely true. In bird culture, that is considered a dick move.
Unless the seagulls pick you up in a giant ass peach with the intention of freeing you from an abusive parent.
However, if A Flock of Seagulls picked you up and took off with you, there WOULD be legal consequences.
This is their land, we just moved here
Seagulls have no respect for the law. https://i.makeagif.com/media/2-19-2018/aP6IRw.gif
What if they poke you in the coconut?
That counts as consent.
then the coconut has a pretty good case and should call a lawyer
Well, I'd like to see anyone stop me, cuz my living room full of seagulls begs to differ.
When the feds come to your door, they're gonna hear all those seagulls.
This entire post has been a wonderful read. Thank you all, for the good work you do.
You're welcome. Happy to contribute useful knowledge to the community. 👍
Bird law in this country is not governed by reason.
What if someone ask that you "come with me", lesbian_seagull?
This law brought to you by the seagullmen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lNqicJOvR8
They can absolutely kidnap you though
Does this cover ducks at the park too? Because if so I think I'm in trouble.
Wild ducks are also protected under this law.
If they are domesticated ducks, then they are more than likely owned & you may have committed the crime of theft.
If you find a domesticated duck at the park with conformation that it is not owned or was abandoned, go for it.
Ducks are so messy, though.. so unless you have an adequate outdoor space with a good water source, maybe rethink your duck-yoinking.
No. It can’t. Alex Jones would never lie to me.