Attach a bidet to your toilet. It's worth it
Not only will a bidet save you on toilet paper, but you will actually feel like you have a clean butt after pooping. Initially it feels weird, but after you get used to it, you won't want to poop without it.
BTW in case you are wondering: yes, you still need toilet paper to wipe the water off. But it is a small amount.
Literally the only downside of a bidet is that after you get accustomed to it, pooping anywhere without one might as well be torture
I feel like a dirty savage when I have to poop in strange bathrooms. Took me 45 years to realize that bidet is the way.
What changed your mind? I've been trying to convince my pleb friends for years now and they all get awkward when I bring it up. Everyone poops. Do it better. You can get aftermarket add-ons so cheap now there's no reason not to.
Edit: sorry just switched instances and didn't realize how old this post was.
I can second everything said here.
I wouldn't have dared eaten 4 Volcano tacos & 1/2 a volcano burrito from Taco bell at once if it wasn't for my bidet attachment.
It saved me at 11pm,1am,3am,3:15am,3:50am and then finally at 4am. I saw the beans meme be brought to life & flourish that night as the water cleaned away the sins from my ass.
Eating them at night before 4th of July was a decision.
The number of risky food decisions I’ve taken since purchasing a bidet is uncountable. A good bidet truly absolves you of all food sin.
You can also buy a portable Bidet for like 10 bucks
How well do they work?
Pretty good! The ones with the sharp bend are better than the straighter ones.
Fill it up with warm water before you poop for comfortable washing action.
No more wiping a permanent marker.
You do you, but that sounds a little extra. Unless it's for your hotel room or something.
If you're fortunate enough to have a bidet AND a dryer, no toilet paper required baby.
I think I’d like to double check.
I spent $300 on mine and my QoL improved immeasurably. Best money I have ever spent. It’s worth every penny!
No need to wipe dry with TP. Simply twerk your ass until it dries.
I use a butt towel. Just need to remember to move it if any guests visit, lest they start drying their face on it.
Honestly, splurging and buying a more-expensive ones is worth it. I now require a heated seat, warm water, and a dryer.
Pfft, real upscale bidets also have lights, background music, and spray your bottom with your choice of scent when it's done (Cherry, Vanilla, or New Car Smell).
Whatever you do, I would NOT, go in there!
I really want one, but I’m renting and the model I want needs an electrical outlet. There’s one on the other side of the wall right by my toilet, but I can’t have one put in.
Get an analog one without delay. That was my #1 concern before getting a bidet: "Wouldn't the water feel cold? Do I need a heater?" Guess what! After getting one that simply plugs into the cold water pipe I can now tell assuredly: the ass can't tell the difference. There are simply not enough nerve endings down there to sense the cold. Wish someone had told me sooner!
I'm late to this but it's also the 2nd from the top all time post here so I think it should be said. I disagree, at least with a cheap add-on bidet.
The cheap ones don't heat the water first so you're sprayed with cold uncomfortable water, then you're left with a wet, cold, soggy bottom that you then need to wipe dry, so you still ended up using some tp.
I just don't get how poo doesn't spray everywhere
It sprays into the toilet
but your asshole is not in the toilet. 🤷♂️