Today I again woke up with thoughts of that little girl from the park again. She was only 7 years old, and yet she has this innocent beauty that just consumes me. Her bright blue eyes, her curly brown hair... it all plays in my mind like a never ending tik tok or some shit.

I know I should be ashamed, but I can't help how I feel. I've tried to fight these urges for years, even attended therapy sessions and joined support groups, but nothing seems to work. Every time I think I'm making progress, some new little face pops up, and my heart starts racing all over again.

I wish I could be normal, that I could just look at children as kids and not as objects of desire. But the truth is, I don't know who I am anymore, or what I want from life beyond these fleeting moments of pleasure.

As I sit here I wonder if anyone can ever truly change the way the brain is wired. Maybe someone will see this posted on here one day and Ill probably be long dead by then.

For now, all I can do is continue trying, one day at a time. Maybe someday.

Good reddit clone btw

The Canadians sent them indians an (at the time) state of the art CANDU reactor, which they almost immediately detonated (look up 'smiling buddha test'). The domestic reaction to this incident caused Canada to immediately stop exporting technology for nuclear power, and eventually stop developing it. 60 years later and your favourite Indian restaurant isn't serving palak paneer today because the power is out again and they can't run the blender.

I've had a busy week at work and it completely slipped my mind that today was my daughter's 7th birthday. I got a text from my wife this afternoon asking if I was on my way to the party I was supposed to pick up the cake for. I rushed to the store but they were all out. I showed up empty handed to a room full of disappointed kids. My wife is livid and my daughter is crying, hopefully they'll forgive me after some serious groveling and daddy daughter time this weekend.

This was back in 2013. I had a huge crush on this girl and she knew it too. We would hang out and talk practically every day and we got to know each other better and got closer pretty quickly and one day after school her, her sister and I were outside waiting at the pick up area and we were playing around and she pinched me pretty hard and so because we were playing around all three of us I pinched her back not even half as hard as she pinched me and after that we were still talking and laughing until eventually she got picked up by here parents.

Then the next day I don't here from her and it goes like that for a few days until one of her friends comes up to me asking about her and I and how the girl that I had a crush on is saying that I abuse her. After some talking and trying to telling her what really happened, we began to ask ourselves why in the world the girl I had a crush on would even say something that drastic about me of all people, someone who has only ever wanted to just treat her well and take care of her and just be a good genuine boyfriend to her. But ever since then I've just heard rumors about how I hit women and how I'm a bad guy, and I've just spent the rest of my two years of high school just keeping to myself trying to keep a fair enough distance from any other girls that's either come to talk to me or even just in the halls, even out in public.

In 2017 I had started looking for online groups and forums with shared interests, specifically about gardening.

I came across this discord channel named "GardenOfEnlightenment" on Craigslist (I swear most things on this site are some kind of red flag anyway). The name was a tad bit dramatic, but the posts about organic gardening, heirloom seeds, and composting techniques were all intriguing.

It seemed like the average gathering of gardening enthusiasts. Their channels would be mainly full of daily watering strategies, best home made weed repellents, input on the ethical treatment of aphids etc.

But as I delved deeper, I started noticing a recurring theme that should have immediately rung alarm bells. The moderators consistently referred to one user, "@GreenThumbProphet", with an almost startling reverence. Another red flag I guess was that their discord conference was invite only.

Eventually I was invited to my first “Grand Harvest Weekend Summit”. I was super excited to exchange plant trivia, share harvest tactics, and maybe gain some wisdom on battling pests organically.

It became evident quite quickly that this was distinctly not a normal gardening meeting when the hosts initiated by lighting candles and chanting in a language unfamiliar to my ears. They started talking about the Green Thumb Prophet’s teaching “to achieve eternal life through the balance of nature". First I thought it was some kinda stupid fucking joke, but soon it was clear that it was anthing but.

Everyone then extended their hands towards the screens, as one of them stated, “Now let's accept the blessings of the Green Thumb Prophet."

They then proceeded to "sacrifice" a basil plant by basically burning it alive with a blow torch.

Not gonna lie that shit was preety amusing. I left their stupid server immediately thereafter. Wonder if they still have one today.

TLDR: Joined an online gardening group that turned out to be a cult. Got a good laugh out of it so lol I guess.

I was driving home last night after a long day at the office, my brain was fried from slogging through paperwork and dealing with some of the less pleasant of my co workers.

I was driving a bit slower than usual, whilst thinking deeply about something I cant even remember anymore when I noticed the flashing lights of a police vehicle behind me. I pulled over to the side, feeling a bit nervous (First time getting pulled over). It was late, and I couldnt help but remember all the traffic stop gone wrong video I have seen on youtube over the years.

The police officer walking towards my car was tall, with a decently large build and short hair. I could see the hard set jawline and steely eyes. As she approached, I couldn't quite make out her features in the dim street-light but her silhouette was undeniably masculine.

When she stooped down to address me, her voice was noticeably feminine. However in the stress of the moment, I wasn't quite as observant as I could have been, and I let slip a "Good evening, Sir".

Instantly, I realised my mistake. The cold glare she shot back at me said more than her words could have. "Have you been drinking tonight, Sir?" she asked me...

I quickly denied it, assuring her that I'd just had a long day at work. Unfortunately, my blunder and panicky voice seemed to have made her suspicious, and now she was requesting me to undergo a field sobriety test.

After what seemed like an eternity, the tests were completed. She studied the results, which thankfully, confirmed my sobriety.

"So you're just an idiot?" she asked me. I could only nod in embarrassed agreement. Needless to say, I drove home far more sobered and than usual.

Btw before I start we need a #TIFU clan asap

Our family has a tradition of having a huge 4th of July barbecue at my aunt and uncle's house every year. They have a fantastic deck and a huge backyard which makes it the perfect location. Everything was going smoothly this fateful day. The grill was hot and stuffed with sizzling burgers and smokies, people were boozing up and children gleefully running around with sparklers.

Let me introduce my aunt. Aunt Marlene is a vibrant lady, notoriously known for her eccentric fashion choices, but loved by all. One consistent aspect of her look was a flaming red wig, which she wore like a crown. She was pretty proud of it lol...

In one handI had a spatula, the other, my favorite beer, juggling between flipping burgers and sipping my drink. Aunt Marlene was sitting nearby, engaged in an animated conversation with my cousin. All was perfectly normal until...

I miscalculated a burger flip and it landed not on the grill, but instead in my open beer bottle. The splashback sent an unanticipated shower of beer towards Aunt Marlene, specifically towards her prized red wig. This alone was bad enough, except for the fact that Aunt Marlene was enjoying one of the kids sparklers at that very moment.

In a split second that seemed to pass in slowmo, I watched in wideeyed horror as the sparkler set the alcohol soaked wig on fire. Aunt Marlene, bless her soul, didn't realize it immediately, assuming the gasps and screams were from the children enjoying their games.

It was only when my brother, quick on his feet and perhaps waiting for a moment just like this, dashed over with a bucket of water and unceremoniously doused Aunt Marlene, that she realized her crown was aflame. Her high pitched squeal haunts me even now.

Luckily, Aunt Marlene was not hurt, the fire had only singed a bit of her beloved wig. The rest of the night was spent in between apologies, laughter, and the most embarrassing moments of my life as I stood soaking wet alongside Aunt Marlene after my brother splashed us both.

TLDR I splashed beer on my aunt's wig, which caught fire from a sparkler she was holding. Resulting in creating a family legend at the expense of my dignity.